Rollercoaster Ride of the Day

Coldplay came on my ipod just now. My jaw clenched and so did my fists.
Fighting the tears back. I cannot cry. And I will not.
I quickly changed the song in doing so I dropped my radio.
Guess I'm still angry.
What do ya know? Ha!
Today was a rollercoaster for me. It started off well-
Waking up next to my boyfriend sleeping next to me on his bed. It's always a good feeling. Waking up next to someone who -yes I'm going to say it-Loves you.
Came back to my mother's to feed our son Carmine Sebastein Bach ( our iguana ). I spent the rest of my time studying for my big state test.
By the time we got to the testing center I had forgotten everything as soon as I walked into those doors. All that was going through my mind is how much I had gone through to get to this point.
From my first day of EMT training, the loved ones I had lost, leaving my fiance, to the day I passed my training courses.
All of those memories went though my mind and it gave me more motivation to stay focused on those questions.
Sad thing was. The computer stopped my test early.
That can only mean two things, I failed or I passed.
So now I'm on the edge with that hanging over my head.
I ate my sorrows away in left overs and avacado sandwhiches and some o.j. I'm such a fatass I know. I eat when I'm upset this has not happened in awhile.
My appetite has certainly changed these passed few months.
Usually it be a nice tall can of beer or a vodka drink.
So now Iam off to bed to ...try and get some sleep.

Be seein' ya!